You can’t teach height
Red Auerbach (Boston Celtics Coach)
Height is great for sports, especially basketball, but it is also handy in normal society. It confers strength and good genes, you also get paid more. But like any attribute it is a double edge sword.
I waited in the foyer of a large utility company, it was trying to be funky and modern with tv screens and bold colours. While waiting for the hiring manager, I watched the promo videos on loop of happy, diverse customers.
The videos took my mind off my own fears of the upcoming interview. Don’t talk too much. Focus on these points. Don’t talk too much. Don’t speak to fast. Don’t talk too much. Stay calm, speak slowly, it conveys confident. DON’T TALK TOO MUCH
A women came out of the elevator and walked towards me, she smiled and asked if I was Luke. I met her smile with my own and I stood up. I kept rising and she kept getting shorter. I was over a foot taller than her. As I continued to get taller, her face washed with fear. I am not sure if she knew it, but in that moment I knew I had no hope of getting the job.
Fear makes a fool of us all. I think I read that somewhere. It sounds cool. If I did come up with it feel free to quote me. If I didn’t, I apologise to who ever I did.
I am working through my own challenges in fear but this blog is going to talk about fear in leadership and how it quickly and quietly kills teams and efficiencies.
Fear is not the problem. Not acknowledging the fear is the problem. People can sense fear, just like dogs can. When you are scared but you don’t acknowledge it then it ruins your teams trust in you. It seems counter-intuitive but expressing your fear makes you a stronger, more respected leader.
If you didn’t have any fears you probably have some deeper psycholgical issues that need addressed. Everyone feels fear, it is normal, the question is what do you do with it?
Maybe fear is a bad word. Maybe a better word is feeling uncomfortable. As a leader, you might feel uncomfortable with a decision, with a question, with a team member, with a stakeholder. That uncomfortableness doesn’t mean you are right, it just means your body is telling you something. You job then is it search into those feelings and try to understand them.
I was working at Weta Digital, and there was an animator who was world class in a room full of world class animators. He was well below average height and I am well above average height. He said that my physical presence scared him because I was so much bigger than he was. I told him, you are more valuable to the company than I am and my height had no relationship to our abilities in our job. Both were true.
You could see his chest pump up, he stood taller, he claimed his space, and he never mentioned my height again. His fear was real, but it was unfounded and wasn’t helping him. Approaching and discussing his fear over came the issue and solved his problem.
Your job as a leader isn’t to be brave beyond human capabilities, it is to be honest and open about your fears so that your team can feel comfortable coming to you with theirs.
Leaders make people better. Managers manage tasks. Pick which one you want to be.
Luke McMeeken-Ruscoe 